Chat History as of 3:38:58 refresh

Spring Angel: Well it's a new year, and I think that's good. I bought a new book at the direction of my therapist and started it today. —03:38:58

beautifulsomeday: Hi Spring! —03:38:44

Spring Angel: Hi, Still Spring, skinpicker. —03:38:14

Spring Angel: After I have introduced the topic, if you would like to share please type an asterisk * as an indication that you are raising your hand, and you will be called on in the order your hand was raised. When you have been called on, introduce yourself, ?My name is ___ and I am a skin picker?, type your share, and when you have said all you wish to say, type ?Done? Please avoid cross-talking and interruptions during the meeting. Let each person share and type Done before raising your hand. After the meeting is closed we can chat openly. Please Remember this is an Anonymous program: ?Who you see here ? What you hear here ? When you leave here - Let it stay here? —03:37:52

Spring Angel: And there are more Promises, quoted from the Big Book of AA, page 84 . ?And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone ? even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! THAT IS THE MIRACLE OF IT! (my caps) We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality ? safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in FIT SPIRITUAL CONDITION (my caps)? —03:37:39

Spring Angel: The Promises (from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 83.) which occur during Step 9: ?If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. ?We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. ?We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone we will see how our experience can benefit others. ?That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. ?Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. ?We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We sill suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. ?Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us ? sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. ?They will always materialize if we work for them. —03:37:22

Spring Angel: 1. We admitted we were powerless over skin picking and that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our Will and our Lives over to the Care of God AS WE UNDERSTOOD HIM. 4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. 5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. 6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. 7. Humbly asked him to remove our Shortcomings. 8. Made a list of all persons we have harmed and became willing to make amends to them all. 9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. 10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. 11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God AS WE UNDERSTOOD HIM, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. 12. Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps we tried to carry this message to other Skin Pickers, and to practice these principals in all our affairs. —03:37:08

Spring Angel: ?God, Grant me the Serenity to Accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.? This is an Open 1-hour meeting, which means that anyone who is interested may attend. Please bear with me while I post some basic stuff. OSPA is an organization of people who share the common problem of Obsessive or Compulsive Skin Picking, We seek to recover by working the twelve steps together, and sharing our experience strength and hope with each other. —03:36:47

Spring Angel: I would like to welcome you all to the Meeting of OSPA (Obsessive Skin Pickers Anonymous) and would like to thank you all so much for being here! I would like to open the meeting with a moment of silence followed by the Serenity Prayer: —03:36:22

Spring Angel: Hi, I?m Spring and I?m a skinpicker. (and you respond: ?Hi Spring!? if you want.) —03:36:16

Bobbie: hi, jackie! —03:36:15

Spring Angel: Hi Jackie! —03:35:49

SJM: Hi everyone! —03:35:46

Spring Angel: Shall we start? —03:35:35

SJM: —03:35:34

Spring Angel: Got a kitty cat on my lap. —03:35:17

Spring Angel: I'm fine, thanks! —03:34:55

beautifulsomeday: I am well, thanks —03:34:38

Bobbie: good, thanks. and you? —03:34:33

Spring Angel: How are you Bobbie, beautiful?? —03:34:00

Bobbie: hi spring and beautiful! —03:33:50

Spring Angel: Hi and Hi!! —03:33:32

beautifulsomeday: Hello! —03:33:03

Bobbie: —03:32:58

Spring Angel: The first Monday OSPA Meeting of 2009!! —03:28:39

Spring Angel: Hi, Welcome to the Monday 6:30 OSPA Meeting!! —03:27:49

Spring Angel: —03:27:19

Nidea: Good night! —03:58:19

megan: Good night everyone! —03:57:08

SJM: I need to run, good night, everyone! —03:57:07

Bobbie: Thank you, everyone. Have a good night! —03:56:37

megan: Thank you Jackie! —03:56:35

SJM: Thanks for a great meeting, everyone! Megan, I wish you well with your meeting. Remember, you are not responsible for that woman's happiness. : ) —03:55:44

SJM: Don't Pick no Matter What, and Don't Pick Between Meetings! Keep coming Back! It works, if you work it so work it 'cause you're worth it! The meeting is now closed, and if you would like to stay and chat please feel free. —03:55:17

SJM: As joined our hands of many shapes So join our hearts of many faiths And lift our eyes from suffering So blindly trusting following You lead from dark paths of despair To the sunlit highway where In your name we humbly pray and thankfully receive your Grace. —03:54:49

SJM: would like to close the meeting by asking all of you to mentally hold hands, and I will close with this non-denominational prayer to a higher power of your choice: —03:54:38

SJM: I am going to close now. —03:54:13

SJM: I also think sponsorship can be like therapy in that the relationships don't always "click"; sometimes it takes a while. In any event, no one should be "telling" anyone else what is right or wrong in this program. OSPA is a very welcoming program. —03:53:41

megan: Thanks, Bobbie. —03:52:47

SJM: Thanks for sharing that, Bobbie. I think whatever works best for you is what is important. —03:52:31

Bobbie: but i'm frustrated becauise people keep telling me to do that. and i feel like they don't understand how i'm different. so i get frustrated and feel bad. but i still feel i'm making progress by doing things on my own. thanks. *done* —03:51:46

Bobbie: i am a bit autistic (aspergers) and i don't respond well to people trying to direct me. it always seems to frustrate me instead of helping. but everyone says you have to get a sponsor. maybe it is my "special needs" but i don't see the point of ruining a relationship with someone i can appreciate and learn from just by watching them "do their own lives." that's how i learn best, not when someone tries to "give' me the answer to tell me. its by example, when the other person is just focusing on their own lives and sharing for themselves, not to try and "teach" or "give me anything" that i can absorb it. so i choose to keep the relationships positive so i can like people. but i'm frustrated —03:50:46

SJM: Bobbie? —03:50:12

Bobbie: I have had a few sponsors in different 12 step programs before, and it hasn't worked out well for me. —03:46:43

Bobbie: I just wanted to say that I am having a hard time with the whole concept of sponsorship. —03:46:18

Bobbie: hee hee. —03:45:28

SJM: Oops, I always ask that too soon! Go ahead, Bobbie! —03:45:16

SJM: Shall we close then? —03:45:04

Bobbie: * —03:44:58

SJM: Or would anyone like to add to their share? —03:44:15

SJM: Is anyone else here who would like to share? Please signal by *. —03:43:13

megan: LOL! We'll see! —03:42:54

SJM: Just make sure you don't let go of your barf! LOL (I couldn't resist...) —03:42:27

SJM: Thanks, Megan, this is a difficult situation indeed, but I know you will be in good hands with your HP on your side. —03:41:58

Bobbie: Woot! You go, girl! —03:41:51

megan: Great topic! Done. —03:40:58

megan: Even though I want to barf, I know that people-pleasing and avoidance are not the way to go. Letting go is such a challenge right now. But I have to let go of my ego. So much easier said than done. —03:40:45

megan: This brings up a couple of my biggest fears and issues, namely conflict, and trust issues with women in particular. —03:39:46

megan: I'm more anxious than I can express. But all I can do is let go, be calm, pray, and do the best I can. —03:39:12

megan: I'm having to break off my sponsor/sponsee relationship with my 12 step sponsor, and I know it is likely to make her feel like a failure and have codependency issues come up. —03:38:28

Nidea: No doubt! Good job! —03:37:45

megan: I've been dealing with conflict, and have to have a positive, respectful discussion with the other person involved tonight in a couple of hours. —03:37:35

Bobbie: Hi Megan! (Good job!) —03:37:25

SJM: Congratulations!!! —03:37:06

megan: I can't believe I haven't picked these last few days! I haven't been 100% but it's been very minimal, considering. —03:36:48

SJM: Hi Megan! —03:36:32

megan: I'm Megan, skin picker. —03:36:22

SJM: go ahead! —03:36:10

megan: Sweet! * —03:35:56

SJM: Hi Megan! We're talking about surrender--"letting go and letting God (your HP)" —03:35:26

Nidea: Thanks Bobbie. —03:35:15

SJM: Thanks, Bobbie! Willing to be willing is a great first step! —03:35:06

megan: Thanks Bobbie! —03:34:47

Bobbie: So I am going to pray about that and ask God to help me. Thanks. Done. —03:34:26

Bobbie: And I am still that way. —03:33:20

Bobbie: I was convinced something terrible would happen if i let go. —03:33:06

Bobbie: and I was the only one who couldn't or wouldn't do it. —03:32:47

Bobbie: That meant putting your arms in front of you, and kicking off the edge of the pool and "letting go" as you glided across the pool with your face in the water. —03:32:29

Bobbie: I don't know why I"m so afraid. When i was a kid and i got swimming lessons, you couldn't progress into the intermediate class until you passed the test for beginner which included having to do the "torpedo" across the short end of the pool. —03:31:15

Bobbie: I've also had some great experiences with peace when i was praying and trying to let go. —03:29:38

Bobbie: Like a cat being put into a bathtub. —03:29:01

Bobbie: Letting go and letting god. I have a fear of letting go. —03:28:46

Bobbie: It is so easy to forget the peace that comes from being in contact with HP. —03:27:52

Bobbie: I spent a little time praying today at a 12 step meeting, and was thankful I was able to feel "connected" more than i have been lately. —03:27:14

Nidea: Hi Bobbie. —03:26:44

SJM: Hi Bobbie! —03:26:24

Bobbie: I'm Bobbie, and I'm a recovering picker. I appreciate hearing your shares about higher power and spending time and letting go. —03:25:39

SJM: lol, go ahead! —03:24:34

SJM: Bobbie? —03:24:27

Bobbie: * —03:24:22

SJM: Thanks, Nidea, you are so right about distractions! —03:24:15

Bobbie: Thanks, Nidea! —03:24:03

Nidea: Done —03:23:25

Nidea: I just pray for the grace to remember to pray in the middle of the chaos. —03:23:11

Nidea: Working the steps is the only way out, though. —03:22:38

Nidea: I guess I'm silly, then, because I seem to keep doing that. —03:22:21

Nidea: It takes moments of clarity to come to a realization of how silly it is to take this world too seriously. —03:22:06

Nidea: This world can be very distracting. —03:21:35

Nidea: It is hard - like a bad habit that has to be unlearned and replaced by healthful ones. —03:21:13

Nidea: I am learning, though, to slow down and pray in the middle of my stressful moments. —03:20:52